You will always hear how planning a wedding is hard but it is nothing compared to staying married for a lifetime.
The promise of forever and always is a lot easier to make than it is to keep. If you and your partner are struggling and facing difficulties then it is best to look for a marriage counselor to help you work through your problems.
It is important to remember that going to therapy does not mean your marriage is ending. Rather it means that you both want to save it.
If you do decide to pursue marriage counseling, here are five factors you should consider looking for in a marriage counselor:
1. Qualifications And Certifications
An obvious consideration should be given to a therapist’s qualifications and certifications.
By no means do you need an ivy league educated therapist, but make sure that the professional you are considering is licensed to practice in your state.
Look into their certifications and ask about their interests that led them to become a counselor in the first place. This will give you a general idea of their competency.
2. Specialization
If you have identified the need to go to therapy to save your marriage from divorce then you probably have a reason that instigated such a conversation.
While the reason to pursue therapy might not be crystal clear, you should have a basic idea of why you and your partner are facing problems. In a situation like this, it is best to look for a therapist that specializes in said problem.
For example, there are quite a few therapists who deal with infidelity and emotional cheating. Similarly, common marital problems such as infertility or intimacy issues should all be dealt with by a professional experienced in the issues.
In all honesty, you will need someone who can deal with sensitive issues such as how to transform your marriage and deal with a selfish husband, etc.
3. Cultural Fit
While it may seem strange to look for a cultural fit when it comes to a marriage counselor, it makes sense when you think about how different cultures perceive traditional roles in a marriage.
These cultural differences run deep and are developed from childhood so you need to find a counselor who recognizes your upbringing while helping you work through your issues.
While it is your responsibility to adequately communicate with your marriage therapist about the issues you are experiencing and how your upbringing could affect them, there needs to be some level of cultural sensitivity.
This is also why many people recommend a therapist that is the same minority as the clients to ensure that they understand cultural norms and oppression faced by minorities.
4. Budget And Insurance
Depending on the health and wellness laws in your country, this could be an easy thing to consider. If you are from a country that has universal healthcare and do not have to worry about private insurance then you should choose the best therapist no matter the price.
However, if you do have to worry about insurance then you should research whether your insurance is accepted before scheduling a session as therapy can be extremely expensive.
You should also talk to your insurance provider about the insurance benefits and what exactly is covered under your plan.
Many insurance companies do not include therapy or counseling of any kind in their base plans. Although, if you are on an employer-provided plan then chances are you do have some extra benefits.
5. Reviews
Just like with buying any products or services, you can look into a therapist’s reviews and what their past patients have said about them.
If you got a recommendation from someone to go with a specific therapist then make sure to ask them why they liked them.
Conclusion
All in all, the process of choosing a marriage counselor is not that different from choosing a personal therapist. However, you need to consider your partner too when making this decision.
